2013

Goodbye 2012. You're finally over. Its been such a long year and it started out so bad, I didnt think I'd get past the emotional break and time seemed to be passing too slowly. Things picked up, I found my share of happiness during the year, I lost a few but I gained a few as well. It definetely ended well though. I was happy, in the end, surrounded with people I love when 2012 bid farewell.

Hello 2013. You started out pretty nasty. Maybe its the perfectionist in me that wants everything to start perfect. But it didnt, and thats why I'm typing this in tears. Its only 3 hrs into the new year and I feel so desolated and depressed. I've never had a new year that was happy as long as I could remember. I feel sad when I look at pictures of other people being happy with their other halves, of with their family. I imagined it to be something simple but meaningful and happy. But nothing turned out well. I'm sad. And I feel so argh, like I just wanna throw this new year away and start again. Yknow how its like, when something is ruined already you just wanna start all over again. Its like, the feel isnt there anymore. I just feel...like...idk, anything but happy.

Spending my new year in tears, wondering whats coming up this year.
I'm afraid of all these uncertainty, double up the fear when it starts out so rocky.
Maybe thats why people drink during festive seasons. Its not to be jolly. fa la la la la la.

sigh~
I wish I could be in 2012 now and restart my 2013.
plsplsplspslpslpslsplpls.

:(

I just want to be happy, esp on happy occasions. depressing T_T